I watched an interesting interview over the weekend on the podcast Dear Future Wifey and it inspired this post. I’d like to start this post off by saying never settle for anything in life. If you know you’re worthy of so much. Be it a better job, a raise or a relationship. Anything that is within your grasp reach for it… it’s definitely attainable. Keep going and keep your faith because all things are possible. Some things take more time than others.
God’s timing is better than yours.
Now back to our feature presentation. Should you settle for just sex when you want a commitment?
First ask yourself these few things. What do I deserve? Do I believe that I’m worthy of commitment? What would I tell my child/children or future kids to do if they asked me this question?
If you wouldn’t tell your child it’s okay to settle, why would you choose to settle? I’m not saying that I’m not guilty of settling. Because I was doing just that up until this year. Just wasting time and passing time with people that weren’t interested in anything more than casual sex and fun.
But why are we still doing this, ladies?? and men?? Doing this made me feel as if someone put my favorite cake (which is chocolate on chocolate.. btw lol) in front of me and telling me I couldn’t have a slice.
I love cake just as much as I love myself. That’s why I learned to set standards. I’m not sitting at the table if I’m not being offered the entire cake and something to wash it down with. I’ve learned to take myself out of situations/friendships and relationships that aren’t fruitful or balanced. Doing so requires a lot of strength.
But once you get to a place of being secure within yourself and knowing what you want. Allowing yourself to stoop down to meet someone at a lower level won’t be possible. But why would you lower yourself for someone who doesn’t see a future with you in it? Someone that doesn’t have plans for their own life and future. Honey, I won’t lie to you, it gets lonely. But during this down time…. work on yourself and your goals.
Goals before bro’s.
Patience is definitely a virtue.
The next thing I want you to do is to ask yourself this… Are you mentally, emotionally and spiritually ready to share your body and life with someone? The next question is… Is your person of interest ready mentally, emotionally and spiritually?
Sometimes we think we’re ready because we are tired of being alone. Or because everyone around us is getting married, having babies, going on dates, couple trips etc… But what we don’t realize is some of those relationships look great on the outside and are rotten on the inside.
Remember salt looks just like sugar.
I really hate that a lot of women weren’t taught as children to really value themselves. Neither were a lot of men. This is definitely something we have to do starting today. Something else I’ve learned throughout the years is that some men think that because they make a lot of money.
Or because of what kind of car they drive and the type of and amount of women they’ve slept with. Make them of high value. Which is the furthest thing from the truth. Anyone that shares their body with any and everybody’s value definitely goes down in my opinion. Because they aren’t truly valuing themselves.
I’d rather be the girl that everyone lusts over….. instead of the girl everyone fucked on and over and I’m still single.
I wasn’t always the woman that I am now. I had to grow into her and trust me it’s been a lot of trial and error. It has been without disappointment, heartbreak and heartache. I can hear some of you sayin “I have needs.” Trust me I get it and know exactly how it feels…. when you need to get that itch scratched.
My back needs to be cracked and the kitty is saying meow right now. But we gotta stay focused ladies. Let’s wait on the man God is sending. Because trust me he’s gonna do all that you want, need and put a little extra on it.
I’ve been practicing abstinence for a few months and it feels great. It makes me feel empowered and inspired. My mind, energy field and womb are clean and clear of negative people and energy. I haven’t felt this good in a long time.
I decided that I wasn’t going to share my body with anyone except the one God has for me. That may just be my twinflame… But we’re in separation right now. But he better get it together!!! Because if another soulmate appears… he may be outta luck lol.
The ultimate goal in life should be doing what makes you happy. Chase your dreams, set and accomplish your goals. Give back to others whenever you’re able to and learn to be happy alone. But if you’re fortunate enough to find real and true love…. never let it go. You deserve to be someone’s everything, not just someone’s booty call.
If you enjoyed this post then check out some of my other blog post like: When Sex Becomes Your Superpower and Is Sex Better Than Love?
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Sending Love and light and positivity your way!